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In 2007 two hopeful couples got together in an open relationship. Some years and a lot of heartache later, we swapped partners and became parents, separately! Soon after that, I and my newer partner left the London high life and moved to a small shopless, carless granite island off the west coast of Sweden where we also had a son...

Life was idyllic, or was it?

New relationship dynamic. New children. New (and terrifyingly for a British mother) coffee drinking country.


I've discovered a lot about myself and different cultures with each country move (this is my seventh). The Swedes eat herring and toss dill around like it's going out of fashion (like on their crisps and stuff?!?!). They're weirdly reticent unless drunk, when they sing songs about small frogs. They leave their babies to nap outside in subzero temperatures. It's healthier, honest.

As I tried to start an online business whilst breastfeeding my son and minding my daughter, the darkness set in for six months and temperatures dropped to minus twenty. And the snow. Oh, the snow. Sweden was beautiful... but dazzlingly lonely and claustrophobic. So as I had once done before, to relieve the stress I started writing.

In the absence of therapy, my blog--this blog--became a kind of DIY mind palace. In these pages I've made it my life's business to try to understand why our minds work the way they work, and to look at how we can rewire our patterning (mostly legally). If you are interested in "by-nature-by-nurture" conundrums, and exploring the dark side of our mind, maybe we would get along.

The purpose of the articles on this site is now to kick the cogs of the system we live by and in. Over ten years I changed from that fresh-faced innocent girl in the first photo. An open relationship, one divorce, one finance career, one career switch, one degree in journlism, one tumour, three country moves, three books and three kids (with two different fathers) later, I can't say which one gave me more grey hair.

I've documented my life in detail on this blog and in my books. Memories from the past, hopes and fears for the future. Some fire crystal pinpricks of joy and sometimes a derelict lanscape of pain. It's my very own Pandora's Box (I mean it's actually Louisa's Box, but that doesn't sound as good).

My journalistic research is driven by my own passions and by the subscribers on my site where their desire for knowledge coincides with my experience and abilities to fulfil their requests. My focus areas are childhood trauma, how it intersects with white women's lived experience under a patriarchal system and how this can impact our adult choices, in terms of addiction, relationships (including why we might feel more comfortable in an open relationship), and mental health. I hope you enjoy it.

Now go get your stuff!