“Intersectionality as a label combines a level of abstraction with an appearance of value-neutrality”, says one European White Feminist.
Nurturance Culture In Action
Through this work, an advance reader copy of Turn This World Inside Out, The Emergence of Nurturance Culture by Nora Samaran found its way into my hands. And although at 140 pages it’s only little, its impact on me has been disproportionately large. It has helped me find compassion; it has helped me connect fragments of ideas which existed in my brain already, but floated untethered in abstract (where they were of no use at all).
TBINAA | Why We Should Say ‘Female Genital Cutting’ and Not ‘Mutilation’
Mutilation depends on perspective for women who’ve experienced it. They call it Female Genital Cutting and Western feminists should listen.
What Aziz Ansari Did Does Not Make Him A Criminal, Unfortunately
Power is the capacity to influence others which–notwithstanding systemic privilege–fluctuates, sometimes on a daily basis according to self esteem, personality, age, maturity and in every unique relationship dynamic. How can power be measured or compared, when there is no absolute, and perception of power is also a form of power?
Lovecraft Was Racist, So Isn’t That How His Legacy Should be Remembered?
Great art changes the status quo and incites critical discourse. Lovecraft’s work, by this definition, is worthy of continued recognition.
TBINAA | When white people are silent in the situations of injustice, they have chosen the side of the oppressor
It is the balance of power which determines whether an action crosses the line from hurtful to abusive. When the power dynamic is out of balance and the person with the power inflicts harm on the person with less–even when it is unconscious–it reinforces their position of power and becomes abusive.
TBINAA | How Do We Create Consent Culture For Our Children and Ourselves?
Consent is not true consent where there is a power imbalance. You cannot make a free and retractable agreement about something, if that agreement is made in fear of losing your access to income, and resources–financial, emotional or otherwise.
TBINAA | Dear White Women: Why We Need to Stop Crying When POC Call Us Out
Don’t do your crying in the company of people of colour. Don’t beg them for forgiveness, after all you are part of a system which abused them.
TBINAA | How Racism Fueled the Manchester Attacks
Britain has never taken responsibility for the bloodshed and exploitation which built the empire. This is evidenced by Theresa May’s hardline on Brexit. We want to take without giving anything in return. We make no apologies for our xenophobic attitudes; our comedy ridicules ‘those bloody foreigners’, our narrow-minded and disrespectful behaviour often shames us in the countries we visit.
White Fragility and the path to White Depression
Gone are the days when I positively affirmed every day in the shower, and shared uplifting memes. Now I see these past behaviours as tragic extent of mine and others’ unawareness. I thought if I changed my mindset and concentrated on dismissing the negative and amplifying positive activism, that the world I wanted would resettle itself with my aligned actions.
White woman in the mirror
Privileged white woman pain is more gradual and less dramatic than that experienced by intersectional minorities. It is insidious. Kind of like bonsai trees, white women have the innate capacity to grow to a normal size but our roots and branches are cut so that we grow far smaller. Stunted or trained along a trellis in such a way that few see, sometimes not even us.
Mithridatism and the Validity of White Guilt
Like Mithridates, the ancient Greek King who–legend has it–ingested small amounts of poison to create immunity, it is the art of swallowing what we hate little by little, of being formed by it, developing an immunity to it and even learning to appreciate the rush it gives us so we can make it in this sick world. If it is no longer poisonous to us, it is easier to dish it out as we deny that it’s poison. It’s still poison though.
The Violent Birth of The Awareness Baby
Perhaps that’s what’s so fearsome for many, they know that with awareness their current selves will never be the same again, they will be damaged.
TBINAA | The Cowardice of the White Woman
Maybe it was then I first asked the question: would I risk my own life to protect the Anne Franks of this world? The answer was always yes. But hindsight is a flattering bedfellow.
The Fucked-up Truth of Non-Dark Alley Rape
When you live as a woman, there is a power imbalance. It means that I would let myself be raped if I perceived a threat to my life.
My Privilege is Uncomfortable
So white folk, we have a task in front of us which might seem huge, but really it isn’t. It is to face our own prejudice when the most obvious and comfortable way to survive is to stay in our bubble. It is to step up and be accountable for our ignorance, even if ignorance is part of our humanity. I will hold your hand as we overcome our fragility and cultivate empathy and battle our minds which tell us that it’s not our problem.
Fighting My Daughter’s Racist Formula
In-groups are formed by what we consider to be ‘relevant’ familiarity. Children, and even adults, process most of our information visually which means that varying skin tones might be not only the first but also the only indicators for who is ‘in’ and who is ‘out’.
Racism stigma furthers the Racist Agenda in Sweden
One reason why this immigration was considered successful had nothing to do with Sweden’s ability to integrate immigrants; only that the type of immigrants arriving were more easily ‘integrate-able’ as is still the case today for me. At first sight therefore, when immigrants are able to fit into Swedish culture at a level which allows them to peaceably live and work within the system, we do not see backlashes against immigration.
Are you a Burning Woman?
Burning Women–as an archetype in our psyche, not a prescribed gender–are rising in the form of intersectional feminists, queer activists and angry people of colour. We are the rule breakers and we demand that our voices be heard. And as we get stronger, so the forces which suppressed us wage an ever more fierce war. But they cannot stop us.
Humans are pre-programmed to objectify. So how can we help it?
Because I went. I saw Tarzan. I objectified, and thoroughly enjoyed doing so, thinking it at best harmless fun and at worst a sort of inconsequential revenge for all the years that my sisters and I have been objectified. This is what the men go on about, I thought. Yes, it’s fun.
When Hurt Becomes Abuse and The Dimensions of ‘Hurt’
Many abuse victims like me, have also demonstrated the same behaviours which can be tagged as emotionally abusive. Yet they are not abusers themselves. Why? At what point does hurt become abuse?
How to Start Using Your Privilege by a Cis-White Woman
To learn on one hand that I have perpetuated systemic oppressive behaviours, and on the other having to face those who have been oppressed and who are angry at me for doing so makes me want to shield myself from the onslaught which risks triggering the terror I felt as a child.
But if I truly want to be an ally, I cannot ignore it.
Harlot Magazine | The Relevance Chasm between Gen X and Y
The consequence is that I must accept the younger generation has implicit knowledge and awareness of current culture that I do not because they have easier access than I do, to their landscape. They grew up in it and they have insights that I do not.
Why I’m Not An Angry Feminist (Any More)
At first, I felt guilty about not feeling angry. What had happened? Wasn’t anger a healthy expression at the outrage in the world? I should be feeling it!
“Feminists,” I told myself sternly, “should be angry. There’s a lot to be angry about.”
Are You Truly Ready For Your Own Power?
Great power comes, with the internet, sometimes completely unexpectedly. You cannot know power before you have it, so you cannot know whether you are ready for it. If you suddenly find yourself in a position of great power, then you can try to wield that power with responsibility and become the hero, or fail (by accident or design) and become the villain. And so, I am afraid. I am afraid that I have invited the mantle of power on my heretofore unproven and potentially irresponsible shoulders.
Murder Is Easy
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What is Integrity? A Useful Model to Consider
I must accept and welcome wretchedness for my daughter, if she is to forge her own way to integrity.