Relationship patterns are glorious things. They indicate we are following a past survival mechanism. It is learned & can be unlearned.
Consequently, success in British cringe comedy is more often to be found in dry, dark verbal humour where jokes preferred in the US might be perceived by Brits as too obvious and schmaltzy. The British are more likely expect you to do the work and join the ironic dots if you want to laugh. America delivers humour to your door in superbly constructed sets of punchlines.
I’d like Britain to be a part of that, I’d like Eurovision to become less of a guilty pleasure and more a resounding celebration of popular music for all countries. I’d like to see even more countries became involved in it (Australia please stay, you were great), for Eurovision to become a concept rather than a ‘club’ where certain member states are allowed to participate.
So a friend of mine has been looking for an assistant. A sign of the times we are living in, he posts a job description on Facebook and receives 15 applications within 2 days. He tells me about the interviews and how he has an excellent woman in mind for the job. I joke saying ‘don’t pick someone based on how hot they are.’ His dry response is ‘well that’s why I picked to work with you.’
Take my daughter’s education. We have a coffee table book of the artwork Great Wall of Vagina showcasing over four hundred different vaginas.
Did I choose to suffer when I was beaten by a man who said he loved me? I would have told you no. Never. And anyone who told me otherwise I would have deemed cruel. Privileged. But now it seems I am a person who embraces that truth. And admitting that maybe, just maybe, I am both cruel and privileged (the latter is certainly true).
The hard part is when those people who’ve been your loyal supporters, even friends over many years come across a showstopper in your thinking. Something which they decide personally offends them. Many of my articles are controversial and have been notable both in a number of new followers and in those who abruptly stopped following.
Great power comes, with the internet, sometimes completely unexpectedly. You cannot know power before you have it, so you cannot know whether you are ready for it. If you suddenly find yourself in a position of great power, then you can try to wield that power with responsibility and become the hero, or fail (by accident or design) and become the villain. And so, I am afraid. I am afraid that I have invited the mantle of power on my heretofore unproven and potentially irresponsible shoulders.
Because the non-violent lessons I have taught her meant that I neglected the most important one. The one about respecting your own boundaries and protecting your own body. Instead I apparently encouraged my daughter to be a good cog in the kindergarten system, to report it to an adult and in doing so taught her to go against her instincts and passively accept violence on her body. She became a victim, because I taught her it was the right thing to do.
Was ‘The Breakfast Club’ ever shouted down from every corner of the internet as romanticizing abuse? No, on the contrary it was effusively hailed as a testament to the human condition. How is it different to ‘Fifty Shades’? Well for one, Anastasia leaves after the beating she actively demanded, she calls him on the unacceptable nature of his actions but Claire goes out with her abuser.
I think a lot of people see gender as something malleable. That I put on a dress and act like a woman, so one day I could choose to act like a man again.
It might be traditional, but it’s certainly not about empowering women. And neither, by any stretch of the imagination is the Miss World competition which puts impossible ideals of beauty on a pedestal notwithstanding the charitable acts of its contestants.
I would like to tell them about the wonderful man who gave to the poor. I would like to show them the legend of the Yule Lads from Iceland and get excited at how they have 13 Santas, not just one. I would like to explain how Coca Cola pulled off the biggest marketing marvel of all time and popularized him in red as opposed to blue.
My way, would be natural I’d decided (with not a little smirk of superiority). A water birth, maybe with a kick of gas and air to get me laughing like Uncle Benny in Lethal Weapon.
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If there’s one thing abusive parents have in common, it’s an inability to control their stress levels. Don’t be that parent.
No matter how much organic produce you buy or exciting names you invent for vegetables, there are some things your child will not eat… although this long list is cut in half if you drown them in ketchup.
Our pop music and comedy is brilliant; in fact our cultural output in general is second to none. I’m proud of it even if sometimes I wonder whether our creativity isn’t because we have a tiny little resentful piss artist inside of all of us.
I must accept and welcome wretchedness for my daughter, if she is to forge her own way to integrity.
When you work all day and every day in a system where psychological manipulation and powerplay are used to create winners and losers, you are not acting with integrity, you are acting in ‘opposition’ and ‘conflict’. When you don’t act in integrity, you are fighting life itself. You are not being true to yourself.
It’s true that business and money is more often used for power and superiority. Good business in economic terms is defined as charging more money for a product or service than what it costs to produce. The difference is supposed to be made up in value. However value is often added by that elusive category ‘brand’ which rarely brings genuine empowerment, but often pulls emotional insecurities to trigger demand…making one person the winner and the other, the loser (and that’s not about empowerment).
I want to shout out to all those who have been brainwashed by the media and who expect hours of pounding that sex is delicious, fruitful and altogether more frothy when you don’t count the minutes.
All sin, therefore, has its roots in what they call ‘idolatry’, which is the attempt to put something or someone in the place of the Creator (especially yourself). This is why vanity (self-idolatry) is a deadly sin in Christianity – woe betide you might cotton on to the fact that you are truly magnificent without God.
Women like men, fear rejection. Coming out as bisexual by dating another woman without a man present, changes your relationship to men and the world forever. If you question the hetero-norm of society by your actions, you become a threat. It’s that simple.
Yeast infections look quite pretty. From this angle. Yeast infections look quite pretty. From this angle. There are some discussions I didn’t expect to be having with my daughter. Not now (when she’s three). And actually not ever (before I became a feminist). “What’s that a picture of Mummy?” said my daughter looking at my Google search results. I resisted … Read More
The goal of the book – as outlined by the author at the beginning – is to provide a new map for relationships. But no book can persuade readers through only emotionless hard analysis, psychological half truths and noticeably ‘masculine oriented’ sweeping assumptions about women and their motivations.
In the online world, protecting your reputation and your voice is survival; so much so, that if someone has made an fool of themselves in public and been proven wrong, they will – nine times out of ten – leave the forum and choose to eradicate their presence; in other words, they commit a sort of social suicide.
f there is one universal truth, it is that we are hardwired to form relationships, both transient and long lasting, inside of marriage and out. And although one of the greatest philosophers said ‘I think, therefore I am’, in my mind it is much more likely to be ‘I love, therefore I am’. Never have I felt as profoundly touched … Read More
As we turn our self-absorbed gaze to how best we can all be portrayed on the web from Facebook and Twitter, to Pinterest and YouTube there is one giant in the online CV world called LinkedIn. And yet LinkedIn has a startlingly, and increasingly glaring flaw. It portrays your entire work history and professional persona, relevant or not. And misses out those brilliant Amazon reviewing skills you do in your spare time which might just contribute to your next job as a Product Manager.
hen I was at my all-girls school my biology teacher blew a condom up like a balloon and brandished it in front of our faces. “Never let him tell you it isn’t big enough.” She shouted. Those of us close enough to smell the spermicide, tittered nervously and gazed at her admiringly. This was cutting-edge sex education. Those of us … Read More