Boundaries are ultra important, both in their definition and mutual respect of them. They must be carefully drawn so that they don’t amount to a tacit veto.
On Creating Authentic Connection
To have an authentic relationship, you must be comfortable with uncertainty. You must be able, not only to tolerate but also enjoy the intransigence.
On The Protocol for Threesomes
Successful threesomes might have many components, but I would boldly state that the best way to ensure satisfaction is through good communication. Yet sitting down to discuss boundaries and consent with long term partner(s) with whom you hopefully have an enviable level of honest communication, is the easier part. It is not so easy to communicate with that spontaneous person you meet at the club, who agrees to participate in fun and games with you and your partner(s) for a one-off encounter.
On What Flavour of Non-Monogamy Is Right For You and Why
But even if you are wired towards the non-exclusive end of the spectrum doesn’t mean that a non-monogamous relationship is suitable for you.
On How To Manage Deeply Incompatible Metamour Relationships
We all have our sensitivities, allergies and intolerances, some of them too deep to change. That can also be the case with metamours.
On whether Polyamory is Simply A Transition from Monogamy to Monogamy
A reader wrote to me and described polyamory might be ‘best thought of only as a transitionary relationship to another.’ A stepping stone.
On Opening the Can of Worms via Non-Violent Communication
We respond with compassion to each others’ emotions. So when we open as emotionally vulnerable, we unlock the ability to communicate compassionately.
On Accepting the Hard Truths of an Open Relationship
We have worked very hard to identify what we still have, and admitting the passion we once had, has dissolved. I cried during that conversation.
On the Supposed Failure of Open Relationships
If you aren’t good at loving yourself, you may resent the time and energy you give another person that you aren’t even giving to yourself.
5 Tips for Coping with the Fear of Opening Your Relationship
Falling in love can knock you sideways. It is thrilling, soul satisfying and spectacularly out of this world. It can also make you thoughtless and selfish.
On Transforming Your Relationship to Open
A transformed relationship is where you a free to look what works for the relationship, rather than at what makes you right or wrong.
On Using an Open Relationship to Escape Your Relationship
A failing relationship has little to do with whether you include others, but whether your relationship is a healthy and stable one.
On Saving Your Relationship by Opening it
It’s a mind-blowing journey and doing it for the first time, means mistakes. Those mistakes will stress the existing problems in a relationship.